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If you have sons, work with boys, or have any connection with boys in the 5th Grade and up...this book is a MUST read. Oh, and the great thing about it is you don't have to read the whole thing. Got a problem with a boy about:
Communication (guess what - that shrug and clipped "fine" can actually mean something)
Helping boys handle anger
Bullying/Teasing (not just about the victim - also what to do if you see it or are part of it)
Taking responsibility for actions
And more issues interwoven in the above topics
This book has a section devoted to each topic. You can read each section as you find time (or as you encounter an issue and want some quick insight). There's also a section on the effects of different parenting types.
This book is written with the input of over 160 boys. It's not an instruction manual on how to raise boys. Rather, it gives you a glimpse on how boys think, what their perceptions are, what they are feeling and the problems they face in today's world.
The author offers advice on how to deal with these issues given the input from the boys. She also includes "LANDMINES" or what not to do because it will backfire. Along with the landmines, she acknowledges you will probably find yourself in a landmine situation, then come to the book looking for advice. Don't worry, parenting usually offers you the ability to experience a situation more than once (smile), so you can refer to the book and have a better idea of how to handle yourself the next time.
Here's an example of some of the insight provided. It's from the chapter on video games following an explanation from a boy on how video games helped to save his life.
"I know is seems impossible to believe that a violent video game based on society's total destruction would make a guy feel more connected to other people and better about himself. If you look at the game he's referring to, you may really have a hard time believing it. But what we think doesn't matter. If boys are telling us that their real lives are so hard and they feel so worthless that escaping into a virtual world makes them feel better about themselves, that's their truth and it needs to be respected."
After reading this particular chapter, I came away with a better understanding of what my son and his friends may like about their online lives. I also can relax a bit because I see that my son still loves to go hang out with friends and pursue other interests. I also understand (at least from a boy's perspective) why the guys will cut each other down and act differently online than they do face to face. I feel better prepared to guide my son when this becomes an issue.
The advice in Masterminds & Wingmen will be invaluable to me as I navigate the teenage years.
Let's just say I've read a few pregnancy books before, and I really can not say this loudly enough: This is the BEST one that I have read so far. Sure, Emily Oster is an economist and yeah, that means that she didn't go to medical school. But! She's clearly incredibly intelligent and she's a mom, so she's been there, and she doesn't tell you what to do. She simply goes over the research behind the recommendations she heard from her doctors and gives you the information you need to make an informed choice. That's what economists do these days (forget about Wall Street - that's a different type of economics). They pull information from random bits of data and put it together to try to make sense of this crazy world. They know what types of research are reliable and which ones should be taken with a grain (or ten) of salt. And man, the world of pregnant ladies sure could use a lot less crazy! Emily Oster tackles an incredibly emotionally charged subject with wit and charm, and manages to tell a great story in the meantime. I might not do all the things that the data indicates is okay to do while pregnant, but armed with Expecting Better, I sure can make an informed choice about the things that are important to me.
And a side note about all the negative reviews here - as has been said before, many of them did not read the book and are merely writing reviews about what they've seen in the media or on certain websites. If you actually read the book, you'll find that the stance on alcohol while pregnant is very clear and supported by solid research. She also explains the difference between saying 'no amount of alcohol has been proven safe' and the idea that a glass or two of wine during your pregnancy is not going to be harmful. Want to know what she said? Buy a copy of the book and read it yourself! You won't be sorry!
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